Relationships Are Work – Treat Them As Such

How To Keep Your Relationships On Track

Relationships are a wonderful and natural part of life. They help to give your life meaning and a healthy relationship can give you deep fulfilment. But what we tend to forget is that great relationships don’t just happen by accident. They take work, a lot of work, by both partners.

Its easy after years together to fall into a rut, to take your partner for granted, to not appreciate what you have, but if you allow this to go on for too long the rot will set in and it will be damn near impossible to salvage your once beautiful relationship. So take the time now to love and nurture your relationship and watch it flourish.

Communication In Relationships Is Key

Think about your relationship for a minute. Do you talk? I mean really talk? About the big things, the little insignificant things and everything in between? Do you share the ins and outs of your day?, your thoughts, your dreams, your fears? You did in the beginning I’m sure, but what about now? And just as importantly, do you listen to all of those things from your partner?

Communication in a relationship isn’t just about talking through problems, its about sharing everything. Every intimate detail which you would never tell others, but you tell your partner because you trust them. They are the closest person to you, or at least they should be, and by sharing all of life’s little problems and details on a day to day basis, will ensure they remain your closest ally.

When your partner talks and shares things with you, make them feel heard, laugh with them, sympathise with them, make their opinion and voice feel valued. Really talk and really listen. Yes you have to talk about the bills and the kids and the bad day at work, but make sure you talk about everything else too.

Fighting In Relationships

If you and your partner have a disagreement, its okay to fight, but keep the fights clean. Don’t say things that you will regret later on because once they are said they can not be taken back. Remember that the two of you are a team and as such should try and sort through the problems together and come up with a resolution together. Don’t resort to name calling or blame laying.

Never go to sleep angry, resolve problems before they get bigger, talk to each other, don’t shout. Think about it like this, are you going to break up over this fight? If the answer is no, then is it really worth the fight in the first place? You both have a right to your feelings and you both have a right to feel heard.

You don’t have to always agree, but you do need to talk about things until you both feel happy with the outcome. Otherwise, things that are left unresolved can fester and resentment can build up. Resentment is a cancer to a relationship. Talk, talk and talk some more, the good, the bad and the ugly, and your relationship will thrive.

Life Sharing

Have something to share, to enjoy. The saying ‘opposites attract’ is true to a certain extent, but you do need shared and common interests to keep the fun in your relationship. Otherwise, before you know it, you will be living completely separate lives. You will both find yourselves exclusively having fun with others, as you no longer have anything in common with your partner.

Whether it’s a favourite TV show, supporting the same sports team or cooking new foods together it doesn’t matter. Just find something that you can do together and that you both enjoy. If you have kids and cant get out as much as you would like to, make fun times at home. Put the kids to bed and have a movie night, play a board game or video game together. Why not  have a romantic candlelit dinner and enjoy a nice bottle of wine and some frivolous chat.

How about taking up a sport together? Golf, clay pigeon shooting or bike riding. Whatever it is make sure you both get enjoyment out of it. Relationships are also about compromise, remember in the beginning when you would sit through a boring sports movie with him? or you would watch the latest romantic comedy with her? Just enjoy being in each others presence.

Make that effort again, ladies…play that video game with him, even if it is boring and you are rubbish at it, he will appreciate the effort. And guys…walk around the shops with her, and be enthusiastic when she tries on the tenth identical dress, then tell her she is beautiful. She will feel special and valued and will appreciate the effort too.

Be Romantic

Buy each other thoughtful gifts for no reason, other then that when you saw it you thought it would make them happy. Write them a sweet note or text message just to make them smile. Tell them how gorgeous they are. Snuggle up on the sofa, hold hands when you are walking together, laugh with each other, kiss them for no reason.

Drag them off to the bedroom, because you simply must have them right then and there. Tell them you love them because afterall, it’s true. All of these little things make a big difference. And if you do them regularly, they will make both of you feel closer, more cherished and valued.

Your relationship is a special thing and special things need great attention. Don’t lose the love you once had for the love of your life. Cherish it, before you lose it.

Further Reading

For a deeper look at sex and romance, read my article entitled ‘How to Spice up Your Sex Life‘. It is full of romantic and sexual tips to make sure you get the best results from your sex life. From sex toys to positions, it is full of great ideas so you’ll keep the magic alive in a relationship.